Journal Entry: Spring 2006
It was the evening of November 12, 2005 when I sat down, coffee in hand, to read my e-mail. This was a nightly ritual I looked forward to with pleasant anticipation. News from friends and long ago classmates. Jokes from my children, warnings about viruses and novenas that would pave the way to the Pearly Gates.
As I scrolled down my eyes paused on a subject: Bad News. It was from my cousin, Mary. Thoughts of her six brothers and sisters flew through my mind. Hesitantly and with trepidation I clicked on the read button eyes glued to the heading. I was not yet willing to read the message. Chiding myself to act my age I slowly lowered my eyes to the short message. It was what I feared. The oldest sibling of the clan, Joseph Jr., had succumbed to ALS the previous day. Memories flashed through my mind as I grieved the loss of a cousin, father, husband, brother, son and friend. And in that grieving a tattered thread of fear entered my mind and taunted me for the next two days.
On the fourth day following Joe's passing, November 14, I was given a mind-numbing diagnosis of my own. I, too, was the victim of ALS, or Lou Gehrig's disease as it is more commonly known.
The following pages are meant to tell a journey of sorts. Hopefully it will help me to express my feelings, good and bad, about the rest of my life. And in some way might help the reader whether family, friend, or ALS patient to understand the heaven and hell of an unfamiliar and fatal illness.
Jill, I, and my brothers and sisters really appreciate what you are doing. I know it is very hard. My Mom died in 2004 and I still miss her. Sharon was a wonderful cousin and friend. As kids, she would spend time at our house. She had told me she always enjoyed the relaxed atmosphere and organized chaos around our old house.
ReplyDeleteHi Alice, I'm so glad you are reading this. It's exactly what she wanted everyone to do!!I'll try to do 2 a week, depending on time....Take care and keep reading.
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